Monster MASH
by Hazel Lea Tifiaeh
Summary: As a doctor it is Hawkeye's job to save lives. But when he saves the life of a vampire does he put everyone in camp at risk? Mela is a vampire using the war as a cover for her feedings, but when she accident gets hurt and ends up patched up at a local M*A*S*H unit she has to keep her secret as she heals from her wounds under the watchful eyes of her doctor.


**Author's Note: I do not own anyone from the show mash or the camp where the story takes place. I hope you enjoy the story. :)**

* * *

Benjamin Franklin Pierce was used to patients fighting him and the nurses, but this girl was different. It was taking just about every able body to hold her down and get the anesthesia mask on her. She was so dead set on them not operating on her, saying that she would be fine. Which he knew to not be true. She had a sever stomach wound due to shrapnel hitting her when a land mine had gone off. They finally got it on her through and after awhile it seemed to be working.

"Finally get everything under control over there son?" Col. Potter asked.

"Ya. Ya." Hawkeye said nodding. He sighed as he put a new pair of surgical gloves on and waited for the area to clear. When everyone was out of the way he went to work on removing the shrapnel and fixing the girl up. He was almost finished with the suture when Nurse Kelly spoke up.

"Doctor she doesn't have a pulse."

"What?"

"I don't know what happened. She was fine one second, now she doesn't have a pulse."

"Damn. Alright I will start chest compressions." He said putting his instruments aside. He then placed his hands in the middle of her chest to started CPR. "Come on don't die on me damn it!" He said as Kelly bagged her. They did that a couple more times before Kelly checked her pulse again.

"Still nothing doctor. What do you want to do?" She asked. He thought about it for a moment.

"Pierce?" Col. Potter said from across the room. Hawkeye just sighed.

"Damn." He looked at her face. "Call it." He said. Just then the girl gasped and shot up on the table. When she looked at him he swore her eyes were a bright crystal blue, which was odd seeing as before when he was helping holding her down he could have sworn they had been brown. Be it a light golden brown, but still brown. He watched as she looked around, before moving seemed to cause pain in her stomach. He then remember he hadn't finished her sutures.

"You need to lay back down. I need to close your wound." He told her. She looked down then and he swore she growled.

"I told you not to do that! That I would be fine!" She shouted at him.

"Excuse me." He said sarcastically. "But are you a doctor?"

"Ye... no. But..."

"Look lady I just saved your life!"

"Exactly! And in the process you have risked your life and the lives of everyone in this camp!" Hawkeye was about ready to argue with her more when two MP's came in and grabbed her by the arms. She struggled against them for a while, but then seemed to give in.

* * *

Mela was rather pissed when she woke up to find the stupid doctor had performed surgery on her even after she told him she didn't need it. She was even more pissed that she had managed to be put to sleep with their stupid human anesthesia. But she had a feeling it was due to loss of blood from the wound which made her weak. After waking up she got into a fight with the doctor that had worked on her. As a former doctor (in her past life) she knew her injury had indeed been bad, but as a vampire she knew it was no big deal. All she needed was a good days sleep and a good feeding or two. The problem was before she would have just left the next night to find someone to feed on outside the camp, like before. But now she was stuck here. She was sure it was still night, but she had to find a place to hide during the day, which wasn't something she could do here. Also she was extremely weak now, and just being in the room with all the blood was getting to her. It was likely she wouldn't be able to travel far now without having a meal or 10, which means everyone in the camp was in danger.

She could have gone on arguing with the doctor all night, but two MP's came over and grabbed her, plus she knew he needed to work on the humans that were bleeding out in the other rooms. But it still didn't help her bad mood. She tried to fight the MPs though as they lead her out of the room, but she soon gave up. Sure she could take them, but at this point that would cause her more damage, which she couldn't stand to take in her condition. So she let them lead her out and into post-op. She laid down on the bed and rested her hands over the wound. She laid there for a few minutes before the doctor came into the room.

"At least let me finish closing you." He stated. She rolled her eyes.

"You just don't give up do you?"

"No I don't. Besides you are just doing more damage to yourself this way."

Mela looked away. As much as she would hate to admit it, he was right. Not that she was going to tell him that. So she lifted up her shirt. She then heard wolf whistles and look at some of the men looking at her. She sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Oh wow. I must say you do have a nice abdomen. In fact it might be the best one I have seen." the doc said.

"Stuff it or I stuff you." She said through gritted teeth.

"Alright. I get it." He held his hands up in surrender. "By the way. What's your name?" He asked as he started finishing up her stitches.

"What does it matter. I won't be here long enough for you to need to remember it."

"Oh? You plan on going somewhere?"

"Yes. Away from here."

"Is that a nice place? I've always wanted to go there." Mela gave him a look. "Look enough with the tough girl act. You aren't going anywhere until I clear you. Got it."

" Just finish up and leave me alone already." She snapped. He shook his head but did what she said. When he left she sighed again. Stupid humans. But it wasn't their fault they were in the dark about the things that went bump in the night. So it wasn't entirely his fault that he was assuming she was in actual pain and needed actual help. Right now she needed to focus on finding a place to sleep during the day. So getting off the bed she made her way out of post-op to look for a building with little to no windows.

* * *

Hawkeye was ready for sleep. After having been in surgery for hours he just couldn't keep his eyelids open. He knew his two bunk mates, Charles and BJ, and commander Col. Potter, probably felt the same.

"What time is it?" He yawned.

"Does it matter? I am ready to hit the hay." BJ said yawing in return.

"I agree. I think it is time to hit the sack. See you fellas later." Col. Potter said grabbing his stuff and leaving the surgeon pre-op room.

"I uh, I think I will be going to bed." Said Charles in his normally bland voice before walking out of the room.

"Well Beej we should get going too before the rats run off with our beds."

"Here here." BJ said slowly getting up. They were just about to walk out the door when a nurse came in.

"Captain Pierce, the female patient is missing." The nurse said.

"What do you mean missing?"

"She wasn't in any of the beds in post-op."

"Alright go check the womens showers, maybe she felt the need to wash up. I will check the mess tent."

"Need any help?" BJ asked.

"Ya why don't you check the supply shed before you go back to the swamp." Hawkeye suggested. He nodded before walking out the door. Hawk sighed and smacked the wall. "What the hell is wrong with that girl." He said to himself before leaving for the mess tent.

* * *

BJ made his way over to where most of the supplies were kept. Opening the door he made his way into the building. He looked up and down the aisles between the stacks but was coming up short. He was at the end when he looked to his right to see someone was asleep on the cot in the back, with a blanket over their head. Walking over to the cot he wondered, if this was the girl, why she was sleeping in here and not in post-op. Shrugging it off he slowly removed the covers from the girl. Her midnight black hair was braided, probably to keep it from going all over the place.

"Miss?" BJ said reaching out to gentle shake her shoulder to wake her up. But her eyes snapped open then and she looked at him. Her blue eyes started into him, in a flash she grabbed him by the wrist and twisted his arm back. Shouting out in pain he tried to assure her he meant no harm, but her hand shot out and hit him in the throat. cutting off his voice and air. He saw her lift her arm back, ready to punch him when he heard shouting. Soon Hawkeye was by his side.

* * *

Hawkeye had searched in the mess tent, the VIP tent and a few others but he couldn't find the girl. On his way back to post-op to see if she had returned he noticed the door to the supply building was slightly open. Figuring maybe BJ was still in there he made his way over. Opening the door he was about to call out to Beej when he heard a shout coming from the back. He got to the back just in time to see his patient about to punch BJ.

"Hey! What the hell is going on here!" He said running over to them. The girl looked at him and growled. He reached out and grabbed their arms, trying to get her to let BJ go, but just as he was pulling she bit into his arm. He shouted out in pain, but she soon let his arm go. Groaning he placed his hand on his arm, trying to stop the bleeding. He heard BJ coughing and taking slow breaths next to him, while holding his arm close to his body.

"You ok?" He asked him.

"Ya." He replied after a few minutes. They both seemed to look up then and noticed the girl was gone.

"Come on." Hawk said as they helped each other out of the building.

"You really should have that arm looked at." BJ said.

"You too." He pointed out.

"Oh my god. Are you two alright? Do you need anything?" Klinger asked coming up to them.

"Ya get Potter and have him meet us in the exam room." Hawk told him.

"Right." He responded turning in the other direction. They made their way to the exam room. Hawkeye was glad when they got there as he was starting to feeling light headed. So he sat down on one of the stools as they waited. It wasn't long before Col. Potter was coming in.

"What happened to you two?" He asked coming over to them. He looked at BJ first, before moving over to Hawkeye.

"You remember girl I worked on, the one that kept fighting me. Before and after surgery. Well she had gone missing from post-op so we went looking for her. I couldn't find her, but apparently BJ did." He said.

"Yeah. Hawk asked me to check out the supply building on my way to the swamp, so I did. I found her sleeping on the cot in the back. As I went to wake her up she twisted my arm and hit me in the throat. That was when Hawk showed." He said rubbing his throat with his good hand.

"Well BJ it looks like you have a sprained wrist. But Pierce you are going to need stitches. This bite is pretty bad." Potter said. "Damn! It looks like I am going to need two replacement surgeons." He helped BJ wrap his arm up before getting the things that was needed to stitch up Hawkeye. Who was none too pleased with it. As BJ left to finally get to sleep he just stayed on the stool he had been on and waited for Col. Potter. He couldn't believe the luck with this girl. She seemed like an omen and he almost wished he hadn't been the one to work on her. After Potter stitched him up Hawkeye made his way to the swamp to sleep. He welcomed the sight of his bed before crashing on it for a little nap.

* * *

Mela was currently sleeping in an empty tent. Why it was empty she didn't care. All that mattered was that she had been able to find it after having to flee from her other bed due to a human trying to attack her in her sleep. Or at least she thought he was trying to attack her when she defended herself. She woke up a few minutes before dusk and stretched. As she looked over her wound she noticed it had healed some, but not much. Probably due to her lack of a meal. She then remembered that she had bit her doctor. Cursing to herself she paced in the room, being stuck there until the sun was down. She should heal him though, it was only fair. But she had to do it while he was sleep, and after she had feed. So after the sun finally went down she made her way out of the tent. Making sure to stick to the shadows. She then left in the dark of the night to find her prey.

After feeding on a few people she made her way back into the camp, again moving in the shadows. Figuring it was best to play nice she made her way back to the post-op room where, when no one was looking, she went back to her bed, and laid down. It wasn't long before a nurse made her way over to her bed, but then stopped in surprise. She acted like she was resting as she heard the nurse go over to the doctor and talk to him, before he made his way over to her.

"You know you have some nerve showing back up here." her doctor said. "After what you pulled today..."

"I'm sorry." She said softly. Not that she was entirely sorry, but still. "My defenses were up, I thought your friend was attacking me. Same with your arm. It was a reflex. I really didn't mean to hurt anyone."

"Why were you even in there? And where did you go afterwards?"

"I uh, have a skin condition. I can't let sunlight touch my skin or I get blisters. After you left me last night I went to find a place with no windows to sleep. After you guys found me this morning I left and found an empty tent."

"If what you are saying in true how did get from the supply building to the tent?"

"I covered myself with a blanket and ran as fast as I could."

"Alright. At least let me take a look at you."

"Go ahead." She said lifting up her shirt. Which again got wolf whistles from the guys that were paying attention. She ignored it though. She noticed her doctor glance up before looking at her wound.

"Well you seemed to have healed a lot over night." He glanced at her. "You know, if you want, we can put you in the VIP tent. That way you have all kinds of privacy."

"Only if you promise to make house calls." She said winking at him. He just chuckled as he slowly pulled down her shirt.

"Only if you promise not to bite."

"Deal." They shook hands. "Just uh fair warnings though. I am a night owl, so I sleep during the day. So avoiding trying to wake me up if at all possible." She said.

"I will try to remember that." He said getting up and walking away.

"Hey doctor." She called out. He stopped and turned to look at her.

"Mela. My name is Mela." She said.

"Nice to meet you Mela. I'm Benjamin Franklin Pierce, but everyone calls me Hawkeye. After I am done with my rounds I will help you move into the VIP tent ok." She nodded before leaning back and staring at the ceiling. Right now she wished she had something to do, she was a busy body kind of person and just laying here was annoying. It wasn't long though before Hawkeye came back to help her move into the VIP tent, which turns out to be that tent she had slept in during that day. After everything was settled he pulled up a chair next to her.

"I must say, I find it rather odd that are you healed so much in such a little time considering the wound you have."

"What can I say. I am a fast healer." He seemed to give her a look, one that said he was in between not believing her and wondering what she was up to.

"Try not to get into anymore trouble." He said before leaving. Mela just laid on the bed, listening to the sounds of the night. She wondered if she would be able to go get her clothes. Then in the distance she heard the helicopters, she knew no one else heard them yet, but with her heighten senses she could. She listened as it got closer, she then heard a voice calling out on the PA system announcing the arrival of the helicopter. She listened as everyone ran about trying to help the people. She got up and slowly opened the door peeking out of it at the scene outside. The smell of blood hit her and she could feel her fangs growing as the hunger for blood washed over her.

"Pierce. We're going to need you in surgery tonight since the replacements haven't come in yet." She heard someone say.

"Alright." She heard Hawkeye call back. She watched as people ran all over the place shouting different things. The doctor in her wanted to go out to help them, but she knew better. So she slowly walked back into her tent and waited until everyone was inside before leaving to get her clothes.

By the time she had got back to the 4077 everyone seemed to be sleeping. They must not have had that many wounded. Putting her clothes in her tent she made her way to where Hawk was sleeping. Sneaking in she looked at the three men asleep on their cots. She slowly walked over to the one she had attacked this morning. Kneeling next to his bed she gently lifted the hand she had twisted. She ran a finger over his hand and wrist and whispered a few words. She then put his hand back down. Moving over to Hawkeye she watched him a bit before kneeling next to his bed. She gently lifted the arm she had bit and brought it close to her. She saw it had stitches, which didn't surprise her. Using a nail she cut the stitches and slowly pulled each one out, making sure not to hurt or wake him. Once she was done with that she ran her finger over the bite. She hated that she had done that to him, but at least now she was making up for it. So she leaned down and placed her mouth over the bite. Her tongue flickered out and licked it a bit. The urge to bite him again and take in the sweetness of his blood was over realming, but she ignored it, pulling back.

As the wound was closing his arm was pulled from her hands and she looked up to see him waking slowly. She leaned forward and placed her finger on his lips.

"Shh." She said softly before leaning over to his ear. "Go to sleep." She whispered in his ear. When she was pulling back she notice him lick his lips, and she wasn't sure why, but she leaned down and gently brushed her lips to his. She then stood up and made her way for the door. As she was leaving she heard him mumble her name in his sleep.

* * *

Hawkeye slowly woke up the next morning not really wanting to get up. But he knew he had to. Slowly sitting up be rubbed his hands on his face and through his hair while yawning. He looked up as he heard BJ moving around in his bed.

"Hows the hand?" He asked. He watched as BJ looked at his hand and moved it around a bit.

"It actually feels great. Like nothing ever happened." Hawk was a bit surprised by the answer, he figure it would be bothering him a little bit still.

"How many martinis did you have last night?" BJ just chuckled.

"Not that many."

"Alright come here, I'll take a look at it." He said buttoning up his pants. Bj walked over and let him look his hand. Hawkeye was surprised to see that it didn't appear to be sprained or anything anymore.

"Well doctor. What say you?" BJ asked.

"Well..." Hawk started to say before Beej interrupted him.

"Wait."

"Wait what?"

"Your arm?"

"What about it?"

"Look." Bj grabbed his arm that had been bitten and turn it over. But there was no stitches, no bite mark, nothing. It was as if he hadn't been bitten at all. He pulled his arm away from him and looked at it himself.

"How many martinis did I have?" He asked.

"Today is tomorrow right? We didn't sleep the month away or anything like that?"

"I'm pretty sure. If yesterday was today, then today should be tomorrow."

"What ARE you two blubbering about?" Groaned Charles as he sat up in bed.

"Nothing your highness, just go back to sleep."

"We should see Col. Potter." BJ said.

"I agree." He said grabbing his over shirt as they headed out the tent to Col. Potter office. When they walked into the main part of the office they saw Klinger there.

"Hey Klinger is Potter in?" BJ asked.

"Nope, just missed him. He was headed to the mess tent for some coffee."

"Alright thanks." They left to go catch up with Potter, as they walked into the mess tent they were glad to see him sitting at a table with Hotlips and Father Mulcahy. They walked over and sat with them.

"Good morning boys. I was just talking to Klinger, he said your replacements should be here within the day, provided the roads stay open and everything."

"Uh Colonel, maybe you should cancel those replacements." Hawk said.

"Why? Is something the matter?"

"Quite the opposite actually." BJ added.

"What are you two talking about?"

"We seemed to have woken up this morning in perfect health. Or at least as perfect as we were the other day." Hawkeye said. He showed Potter his arm, and watched as he, like BJ, turned his arm over and gave it a good once over.

"Remarkable. BJ?"

"Let me see." Margaret said as she looked at Hawkeyes hand while Potter looked over BJ.

"Very strange." Father Mulcahy said.

"Did you put in a good word for us Father?" BJ asked.

"Oh well you know I did, but even He doesn't work that fast." Mulcahy replied.

"Was it like this when you boys went to bed last night?" Potter asked.

"No. I remember my wrist pulsing in pain from surgery."

"Well what do you two remember?" Margaret asked.

"Operating." BJ said.

"Ya exactly. And then we went to the swamp and had a few martinis before hitting the sack."

"Right."

"And then..." Hawkeye trailed off.

"And then what?" Mulcahy asked.

"Well... it must have been a dream."

"Well go on Pierce." Potter said.

"I remember waking up at some point last night and Mela was in the swamp, kneeling next to my bed."

"Mela? Is that the girl that was hiding in the supply building and the reason you two were hurt?"

"Ya. But like I said it was probably just a dream." He said waving it off.

"Well only one way to find out." Mulcahy said.

"Exactly. I think we should march on over there and ask her." Margaret said.

"I... wouldn't do that if I were you." He warned.

"Oh and why not?"

"Well uh she is sleeping, and she told me not to wake her unless absolutely necessary."

"What do you think this is? A chit chat. She has been a pain since she arrived here, and I personally think its about damn time she answer some questions." Margaret said standing up.

"Uh Margaret..." But she was already walking to the door.

"You better follow her son." Potter said. Hawkeye just sighed and got up chasing after her. He was hoping to stop her before she got to the tent, but by the time he caught up she was already opening the door.

"Margaret!" He said following her in.

"Now listen here missy. You better wake up and answer some questions." She huffed.

"Please lets just come..."

"You will listen when a commanding officer speaks to you!" She said pulling the blankets off of Mela.

"Margaret!" He said stepping between them. And it appeared just in time as Mela jumped out of bed and was reaching around Hawkeye to get to Margaret. He turned around to face Mela, holding her close so she couldn't get to Margaret.

"You dare disturb my slumber you puny human! I will show you the meaning of fear!" She shouted. Hawkeye noticed the darkness in her voice, and pushed her back some to look in her eyes. He noticed they were crystal blue again.

"Ugh, how dare you..."

"Margaret, do us both a favor and get out of here damn it!" He was surprised when she stormed out of the tent, the problem now was trying to get Mela to calm down. "It's alright. Calm down, she's gone." He tried to say soothingly, but then she shoved him back, making him stumble and fall to the floor on the other side of the tent. He watched as she went to open the door, but shrieked back in horror as the sun touched her skin. He watched in disbelief as her skin smoked and burned, where the sun had touched it. He heard her hissing as she cradled her arm close to her chest.

"I'll uh... I'll go get you some burn cream." He said slowly standing up. He noticed her eyes shift to him then, like she was just now noticing him.

"No I need to feed." She said softly walking over to him.

"Um alright I will go get you some breakfast, but I must warn you. The food here is terrible." But she was just shaking her head.

"You must go." She said as she tried pushing him out the door with her good hand.

"Woah what's the hurry? You that hungry?" He asked her as she continued to shove him towards the door.

"Please." She said looking him in the eyes.

"Alright, alright. I will go. But I would like to check out you.." He reached for her hand but she pulled it back. "Ok Maybe later." He said as he slowly pushed the door open, he watched as she slinked back into a corner, out of the suns rays. "Right." He said before leaving.

* * *

Mela cradled her burnt hand close to her chest as Hawkeye finally left the tent. She had been so close to feeding on him, a risk she could not take. The pain was searing, she would need to make an emergency trip to find a meal, even in the daylight. But as she went over to the bed to grab a blanket or two to cover herself tiredness overtook her and she fell to the cot, falling into a deep sleep.

Mela woke up just as the sun was setting. Mad at herself for falling asleep she quickly got up and fixed herself up a bit before sliding out of the tent. She made her way out of the camp, going through the places no one would dare to walk. When she was in a village far enough away she made sure to pick someone that was already on their deathbed. Sure the blood wasn't that great, but she didn't want to draw too much attention to herself. She didn't want to risk anything. Once she found someone she quietly made her way into their hut to feed off them. Before leaving she made sure her bite marks were gone, didn't want to leave any evidence behind. She then slowly made her way out of the shack before melting into the shadows to make her way to the camp.

She walked through the door of her tent and was pulling the braid out of her hair when she noticed someone sitting in a chair in the middle of the room. She stopped what she was doing and looked at him. She sighed and ran her hand through her hair as he looked at her and stood up. Without even saying anything he grabbed her hand, the one that had been burned by the sun. That was now perfectly back to normal thanks to her small meal.

"You know if I hadn't seen it for myself I would have sworn that you didn't burn your hand today." He said. She pulled her hand away from him.

"Mind your own business." She said brushing past him, but he grabbed her arm.

"Now listen here. Whether you like it or not you are my business. I have done just about everything you ask, but I want to know where the hell you were! Not to mention what happened to your hand. Was that just a trick you played on me?" He shouted.

"Remove your hand doctor before I break it." She growled pulling her arm from his grip.

"Oh real great. Do you always threaten people that help you? You know I am on your side."

"No one is on my side. I am on my side. That is all I need. I never asked or even wanted your help. I told you that when you first tried to operate on me."

"Oh I am sorry for trying to save your life!"

"What you did was risk the life of you and your whole camp!" She growled.

"What does that mean?" He said.

"Get out." She growled again. She didn't take the time to wait for a response, she started pushing him out the door and when he was out she locked it behind him. She then quickly started to gather her stuff. At this point it was too risky, she didn't care what problems her leaving would cause. She just needed to get away from him before things got complicated. Once her stuff was packed she unlocked the door before cracking it open. When she saw no one she snuck out into the night.


End file.
